Recovery Meme

The Junky's Wife tagged me for a recovery meme.

Here's the rules:


Link to the person’s blog who tagged you.
Post these rules on your blog.
List seven things you're grateful to have learned in recovery.
Tag seven people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
Let each person know that they have been tagged by posting a comment on their blog.

1) I'm grateful to have really come to understand the concept that addiction is a disease. The first time this made sense to me was in a multifamily group. The presenter asked if any of us in the room had allergies, and I raised my hand. He looked at me and said, "you weak little shit. I can be around pollen and my eyes don't swell or turn red or itch and my nose doesn't run. What the hell is wrong with you?!?" It was the first time I was able to get that it wasn't about strength of character or willpower, it was about whether or not somebody is allergic.

2) I'm grateful to have learned that I'm not greater than or less than anyone else. (OK, so that's one of the one's I'm still working on.) I don't have to be, in fact, I'm not expected to be perfect. And nobody else is either. Even my addict. I'm grateful to know that this program is about progress, not perfection.

3) I'm grateful to be learning that it's not about me. It has especially helped me to get to know people on "the other side of the street." When I watch other people I care about, but am not intimately involved with, struggle in the same way that my partner does, it's much easier to get that it really, truly, ain't about me.

4) I'm grateful to be learning about me- my wants, my needs, my feelings. Sometimes, like last week, I have to tantrum to figure out what's going on inside of me. But sssssssslllllllllllooooooooooowwwwwwllllllyyyyyyy, I'm learning who I am. And I'm learning to speak up for what I want.

5) I'm grateful to have learned the Intentional Dialogue. Ok, so this one didn't come from recovery, but it did come THROUGH recovery. I'm grateful to be learning how to give and receive validation and empathy, and to see more and more that when we are struggling the most, we're coming from the same place.

6) I'm grateful to have learned that I'm dreadfully ordinary. It's comical and comforting when the truths I agonize about are mirrored by my friends in recovery. Nothing that I'm experiencing is new or unusual. Somewhere, in my recovery world, I have friends who have been there, done that, and can help me through it.

7) I'm grateful to have learned that there are recovery programs for ME that can help me get through experiences I need to get through. I used to "help" people by taking them to AA. I learned about Adult Children of Alcoholics, and though there's no alcoholism in my family of origin that I know of, knew that I fit many of the criteria. Then, when I really needed it, I found CoDA. Years, later, when I found myself in the throes of the family disease of addiction, I found Naranon. And for that, I'm truly grateful.

OK, tag, you're it:

A Family in Recovery
Married to an Addict
The Hurting Heart
Erin
The Discovering Alcoholic
Tania Marie
mantramine